I realise that I probably haven't updated my blog as often as I should, and frankly, I think for the past few weeks I couldn't care less. Sorry.
Hah, why am I saying sorry?! A monumental battle rages inside my head and I apologise for not updating a BLOG? Why that's absurd! Fight that battle first before entertaining any notion of writing, lest the battle spills into the words like wildfire, creating chaos in content, disparities and conflicts at every paragraph.
What battle? I always say that my mind is like the Houses of Parliament, full of discord, division, and disagreements. And lately the discord rages about God and the future, the division about relationships, the disagreements about family. A battle that had still not being resolved; one that may never completely be won.
They say for anyone to truly believe, there must also be a time of doubt as well. Maybe I am going through that, maybe I am just confused, maybe I am just not faithful enough, maybe I am feeling unworthy again. I don't know.
Maybe I just need to listen more and complain less. Let His words come like a quiet whisper in a rushing wind. Let me just hear Him. Let what I hear be a lamp unto my feet. Amen.
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